oh god the rape fog is back!
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Randomize
