that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
