The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Still dying that you shit outside
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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