that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize
