The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
