I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
You were trust falling into bushes
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
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