"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
