For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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