Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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