Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize