My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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