there's paper in my vomit.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
