Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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