Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
