Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
