I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
