so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
