Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
