she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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