I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Randomize
