omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
