birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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