i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
