I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize