She's JV to your varsity
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
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