she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
