We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize