I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize