never play flip cup with pint glasses
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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