can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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