i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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