Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
