He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Randomize
