oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
