she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Randomize
