You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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