he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize
