The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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