i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Randomize
