Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Randomize
