That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize
