Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
