how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Randomize
