Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
