Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
