Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
