I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
