just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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