Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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