Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
it was like having sex with a tree stump
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
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